The Tales of Beedle the Bard

I’ve been reviewing for a few months now and I’m actually surprised that I haven’t at some stage bring in Harry Potter in one way or another. So may I present my First and hopefully not last review on Harry Potter. Hold your applauds, please, please thank you. Now unfortunately my review is not on one of the Harry Potter novels itself, but one of the alternate books. My favorite one actually, The Tales of Beedle the Bard, written by J.K. Rowling.

I would recommend to all lovers of Harry Potter and even people who aren’t very fond of them, the stories are very well written  and gave brilliant imagery. Unfortunately one or two of the stories may be to descriptive and gruesome for some young fans.

The Tales of Beedle the Bard contains five richly diverse fairy tales, each with it’s own magical character, that will variously bring delight, laughter and the thrill of mortal peril.

The imagery as I said is brilliant, the descriptive imagery is also very well done. My favourite picture would have to be the warlocks hairy heart. Funny enough I think there are two or three books concerning Harry Potter, like this, but I’ve only ever read this one.

 I’ve read this book five to six times now. I just think they are remarkable bedtime stories. Full of adventure, terror, choices, death and a hopping pot. One thing I love about these stories is that it’s not written by J. K. Rowling. After every short story is a few pages from Albus Dumbledore himself, He explains everything that happened and has explanations for simply everything.

“All will change,” they prophesied, “When a maid catches his fancy.”

“Seeing that this was necessary to please her, the warlock drew his wand, unlocked the crystal casket, sliced open his own breast and replaced the hairy heart in the empty cavity it had once occupied.” 

“In his other hand, he held his wand, trying to coax from his own chest the shrivelled, hairy heart. But the hairy heart was stronger than he was, and refused to relinquish its hold upon his senses or to return to the coffin in which it had been locked for so long.”

I thought this book was very enjoyable. I have to say I love it when authors write a second series of sin of books or guide lines to things that have happened to the characters in the actual books, or in this case it’s a set of stories that were said at some point. One of these stories was even read out in the movie. I think it’s an amazing idea when authors do this. It really keeps you intrigued throughout the series.

Lemony Snicket Week

To be honest I really missed reviewing books a lot while my pres were on. It’s the one place I can give my opinion in complete truth. I’ve so many books in my room I’m worried that when we move house that I’ll have to have at least six boxes just for my books. And to think, I might not be moving till the summer and I buy at least ten books every month. Think of the boxes and boxes of books! Ooh glob.

This weeks books are A Series of Unfortunate Events, The Hostile Hospital and The Carnivorous Carnival. Written by the astounding, yet mad Lemony Snicket himself.

One of my favorite things about this book is how you realize how much the children need each other. When Violet is taken from Klaus and Sunny, you can really see how desperate they are for their sister. Klaus and Sunny see that they need their sisters inventive skills to save themselves, not just Klaus’s book knowledge or Sunny’s biting skills.

I think that Klaus is really growing as a character, when his sister is taken he takes charge and becomes the eldest who must save the day. He also comes up with a way to by time, which he uses in the next book, but it sadly doesn't help in the book to come.

I have to say this book of the series is my favorite  so far I hope. They just keep getting better. I hope that when your reading them that your safely sitting down. I found it so amazing that embarrassingly I stood up when something shocking happened. (spoilers, to telling) and nearly fell over the dog in my own home. It was just amazing. For once I felt like I didn't know what  would happen in the end, weather they’d make it or not, but your going to have to read to read it to find that out. I would recommend it to tens and up and would give it five out of five stars.

Now to The Carnivorous Carnival, one thing I love about these books is how the author Lemony Snicket puts himself in the books, It’s done brilliantly. My favorite and first thing I do when I open the books is check the page before chapter one’s picture. On this page in each book there is a very smart and entertaining quote about Beatrice, The authors so called lost lover who is now dead. Some of them are just brilliant.

To tell you the truth I didn’t find this book as good as the last few. It just wasn't as enjoyable. It didn't feel at all realistic when it came to the costumes. I mean Sunny had purple fluff wrapped around her and they thought that she was half wolf. I don’t want to make this book out to be that bad. I have to say the ending was brilliant and it makes up for the start of the book, and the news the children find out will change the plot of the books for the rest of the series. I would recommend it to tens and up and would give it three out of five stars.

“The sad truth is the truth is sad.”

“For Beatrice, summer without you is as cold as winter. Winter without you, is even colder.” 

“In the secret pocket, she often kept a small pocket dictionary, which she would take out whenever she encountered a word she did not know.”

“Miracles are like meatballs, because nobody can exactly agree on what they are made of, where they come from, or hoe often they should appear.”

“For Beatrice, our love broke my heart, and stopped yours.”

“I am so tired, I can hardy type these worfs.”

Hope you enjoyed reading my review.

Witch Crag

My pres are all over. yes! I'm so happy, and worried at the same time for the results.. The good thing is I have no school today. All the teachers are to lazy to get up out of bed because they're so tired of watching us do are pres. Or they're busy correcting them, either or I have no school. I was very tired last night and plus I didn't get to use the internet... Mum... So instead I'm going to start writing now and hopefully have this up before the end of the day. Enough about me, lets get to the book.

This weeks book I will be reviewing is Witch Crag, by Kate Cann. I really enjoyed it, and must recommend it straight away because I thought it was such an amazing read.

In a tribe where basic survival is the only priority, Kita must make a choice: to accept arranged marriages and being treated with less value than sheep, or escape and journey to the place that even the strangest men fear with their lives - Witch Crag.
But a common threat is facing the witches and sheepmen alike. The tribes must somehow overcome their prejudices and join together if they are to win a war that threatens to destroy everything they hold as good.

My favorite character would have to be the main one, for one, Kita’s courage was astonishing, the way she spoke her mind to escape and take care of her friends. The layout and wording were something that always got me interested. My favorite layout of the speech is when it’s about one or more main characters and it’s them giving they’re opinion or expressing their feelings. The way Kita expressed her anger and jealousy towards her friends falling for each other was the most intriguing.

All though in witch crag its self is said to be a terrifying place where men are killed and their body’s hung. I think you will get a surprise when you find out what really go’s on there. I have to say at first I wasn’t happy with the ending, but I realised after a bit of time That I was just so involved in the book, I just didn’t want it to end. From how amazing it was I had to give five stars.

I have to say I haven’t picked up a book that I don’t know a thing about, read it, and enjoy  it as much as I did this book. I really think this book actually had everything from love, to war, to action adventure, to magical fantasy. I would actually read this book again if I got the time. I think I loved it so much because it reminded me so much about the Chaos Walking trilogy. Which is a brilliant thing by the way.

Lemony Snicket week 6-7

Long time no reviewing. It feels like I haven’t review anything in so long. I feel like I haven’t anything in such a long time. I bet I’ve probably lost regular viewers, if I had any (feeling scared). I've still been reading as much as I can with the pres this week, again, sadly. I’ve gotten a little notebook that is just for writing book reviews, so it’s very good at reviewing on the go and not just on my laptop. Also I will now have reviews up every week from today. I’ve really missed it. Here’s this weeks review hope you enjoy it.

This week I will be reviewing the next two book in the (amazing) Lemony Snicket series know as A Series of Unfortunate Events. Which are books six, The Ersatz Elevator and book seven, The Vile Village.

In The Ersatz Elevator, The Baudelaire orphans are adopted by very, very rich people, whose penthouse apartment is located mysteriously close to the place where all their misfortune began. Even though their new home in the city is fancy, and the children are clever and charming, I'm sorry to say that still, the unlucky orphans will encounter more disaster and woe. In fact, in this sixth book in A Series of Unfortunate Events, the children will experience a darkened staircase, a red herring, an auction, parsley soda, some friends in a dire situation, a secret passageway, and pinstripe suits.

I found The Ersatz Elevator to be very entertaining. I know I’ve said in past reviews that the books were getting quite predictable, but by the middle of of this book it was changing in many ways. Things were found out and betrayals were made. Those are the things I thought Lemony Snicket wouldn't write, but he has and now I gotten into them even more. From the near death experiences to them getting away in the end.

Soon after the incident with The Austere Academy the children are taken on by another family. Esme and Jerome Squalor.
Esme is completely over obsessed with what is in and what is out (concerning fashion and style) at every second of every day. That is one of the reasons I find her character so eccentric. She is just amazing, she may not have one little care for the Baudelaire siblings. She would be horrid to them and make them wear a hideous suits that are to big for them. The fact that she doesn't care for anyone else's welbeing I one of the reasons I’m intreged by her. Also She has quite a secret, one you wouldn’t expect.
Jeronme is a bit of a push over and agrees with someone even if they’re wrong, just so an argument doesn't break out. He is quite a very plain and simple person.

In The Vile Village, Mr. Poe has run out of options on places to send the children. He then sends them to a village called V.F.D. where the children are being raised by everyone in it. “It takes a village to raise a child”. I’m this book the children will face migrating crows, an angry mob, a newspaper headline, the arrest of innocent people, the Deluxe Cell, and some very strange hats.

I would have to say that The Vile Village would have to be my favorite of the series so far. From what you expect to happen in each book, is not what you get in this one. You would expect the children to be inventing, reading and well.. Biting, but that’s not the case. They’re also this on the search for they’re friends the Quagmire triplets, Isadora and Duncan.

I really enjoyed this book more than the first few, it’s not at all what you expect. I actually finished this book in one day because I got so intrigued by it all. There was just something about this book that made me not want to put it down for more than 2.3 seconds.
One thing I love about Isadora is that she is a poet, the couplets she wrote were one of the things I waited to read about, especially her ones that were actually riddles in themselves. I have to admit though I only got one or two right.

“Are you ready?“ Klaus asked finally.
“No,” Sunny answered.
“Me neither,” Violet said, “but if we wait until we’re ready we’ll be waiting for the rest of our lives, Let’s go.”

“It was darker than a pitch-black pather, covered in tar, eating black licorice at the very bottom of the deepest part of the Black Sea.”


“There is no way of knowing for sure whether or not you can trust someone, for the simple reason that circumstances change all of the time.”

“For Beatrice-
When we were together I felt breathless.
Now, you are.”

I would recommend these books to ten and up and would give The Ersatz Elevator four out of five stars, and would give The Vile Village four out of five stars. I realised how much I’ve missed reviewing, I promise to never miss another one. Thanks for reading.

Cake anyone?

Also I have my pre's. I promise when they're over to post one heck of a review on the next two Series of Unfortunate Events novels.

Tell me no Lies

I think this may be one of the last reviews I’ll be doing, at least till after my pres. Hopefully I’ll get one up next Monday, I’ll have to wait and see. Anyway about the book I read for this week. It’s quite a short book, only a hundred and ninety-seven pages. Another thing is that this books surprised me an awful lot, I don’t mean that in the case of the story, but in the theme of the book. From the way it explained it on the back of the book it didn't turn out exactly the way I was expecting. Let me explain by telling you the description of the back of the book.

Mike could feel her eyes like lasers, boring into his back. He had to fight not to turn around. Did she know his face? Had she recognized him?
Gemma cuts out pictures of her scrapbook - pictures of mothers, like the one she will never, ever see again.
Mike is a new boy at school; a boy who is desperate not to be noticed - who has a secret so terrible it will haunt him forever.
But Gemma’s sure she’s seen Mike’s face before. And now she’s out to get him.

Okay now to me hen I read that it sound like a mystery book, with suspicion, discovery and maybe a murder. But after reading it I realised half way through it wasn't what I thought. This book, “Tell me no lies” by Malorie Blackman, Is not very well described when saying the story. Even the praise at the start of the book from different places misdirected me. For example “This story goes at a fast pace and has a nightmare logic that is gripping and disturbing”, written by Nicholas Tucker, Independent. From these descriptions and the cover of the book I never would have guessed it was all based on bullying.

After realising the real theme I have to say it wasn't half bad. I’m not into bullying books myself I find them to sad or depressing, which is funny because some of my favorite books to read are murder novels. One thing I enjoy about a book is when the story switches between two characters and how it explains how they both fee in the situation at hand. In this story it explains each side to the bullying, the bullied and the one doing the bullying.

I really like though the fact that both Mike and Gemma’s personal life were so interesting and private. How they hide their emotions when other people were around and in the ways they hid it.

Overall It was a good book, even if it wasn't what I hoped. I would give this book four out of five stars and recommend it to elevens and up. I think next time a pick up a book I’m going to make sure I know what it’s about first.

Lemony Snicket Week 4-5

This is the second Lemony Snicket week now, I think it’s working out according to plan. I’m just going to review to books this week, I find that to be easier since I had to much to write about the books in the first review and I didn’t have enough time or space to write it all. So hopefully it’ll be easier this week.

The two books I will be reviewing are the forth and fifth, The Miserable Mill and The Austere Academy, written by Lemony Snicket of coarse. I have to say they weren’t as good as the first three but they were still morbid and interesting.

One thing I find about the books is this it seems to be the same thing happening in each book. The three children get sent to a new home and guardian who is either cruel or has a problem in there life. Count Olaf dresses up and discusses himself, but it seems the adults are dimwitted and don’t believe when the children say it’s Olaf. He always nearly has the children in his grasp but they just get away just nearly, but I found with the fifth book there was a little twist which has really put my faith back in the books. I’m excited to read the next one.

The Miserable Mill is the forth book, the plot to this one is that the children, Violet, Klaus, and Sunny, are sent to Paltryville to work in a lumber mill. They find disaster and misfortune lurking behind every log. They’re sent to live with the workers, to work and be treated like a worker. One thing I love about these books is that they’re realistic, but this book disappointed me with that. The fact that he think that a baby can fight a grown woman who has a sword, defending herself with just her four sharp teeth is beyond me.

In The Austere Academy, the children are sent to a boarding school, which was really smart to put in the books I think, so the children could learn, invent, read and bite things. I really enjoyed this book because the children have actually made friends. Two other orphans, know as the Quagmire triplets, Isadora and Duncan. You’ll understand when you read the book why twins are known as triplets. The Baudelaire children have to face snapping crabs, strict punishments, dripping fungus, comprehensive exams, violin recitals, S.O.R.E., and the metric system.

I’m really enjoying these books, when ever they let me down in some case they always give me a reason to keep on reading. I would give The Miserable Mill three out of five stars and would give The Austere Academy five out of five stars. I’m really enjoying writing about this one series of books, I’m looking forward to next time.

                             

Dolly

Well this is a first …
This has never happened to me. Ever. Not ever in my life time. You’re probably wandering what I’m babbling on about, the thing is for once I have actually picked a terrible book. There I said it! I a “book reader” have actually picked a terrible book. I never thought this would happen to me but I guess it had to happen to me at some stage. It’s done and dusted now, time to show you my criticizing side.

The book I will be reviewing this week is Dolly by Susan Hill, and surprisingly it’s a horror or ghost story as they say for books. When I picked this book up I was excited about reading it since I had only read one horror/ghost story novel and I didn't even finish it, and the fact that it was written by Susan Hill. Usually the last page of the book is a posh picture (Not judging, that one of my favorite parts of a book) and a paragraph on where they grew up and where and how their life is going now. Also it says a few books they have written in the past. It mentioned that she had written The Woman in Black! I was astonished! I thought this would be the scariest book I was ever going to read, but I was one hundred per cent wrong.

There was one scary part in this book, no scratch that, there was only one creepy part in this book. That was the only good part of the book I’m sorry to say. The middle was very predictable irritating and the end was delusional, not well thought out and was not explained which I find very annoying in a book, especially if there’s not going to be a sequel to explain it for you.

The book was about an eight year old boy who’s parents died and is sent to live with his Aunty in a big, dark, scary house beside a morbid graveyard. A few days later his cousin Leonora a little nine year old girl with curls in her hair who is disobedient, spoilt, rude and well.. a brat of a child technically. Edward’s cousin gets a doll from her Aunty which she’s not happy with. While Edward is minding it he keeps it under his bed. In the middle of the night he wakes up in a shocked condition from the wind blowing through the trees but also from the sound of a baby crying, that is coming from under his bed.

One thing I really didn't like was how she changed it so much. At first they say Edward’s cousin Leonora is possessed by a demon, but then she changes it to a doll that cries in the night. The time and dates in the story I thought were way to active. It went from him being aged twenty to eight to thirty to forty in a hundred pages. Also the ending was very confusing, (warning!!spoiler!!) what happened was Edward had buried the doll in the ground and when they dug it up it looked like an old woman with wrinkles and it’s hair had fallen out in chunks. It turns out that that is how his cousins child turns out to look like, she had cancer. Then his daughter turned out like a doll that he gave to his cousin for her daughter turned out like a doll that he gave his cousin for her daughter.

I’m sorry to say that I didn't enjoy this book, It was a very big disappointment. I would recommend this book to older people maybe in there seventy’s or eighty’s, I would give this book one out of ten. Susan Hill has let me down.  

Lemony Snicket week 1-3

Okay, this is the first ‘Lemony Snicket week’. This week I’ll be reviewing the first three books in the ‘A Series of Unfortunate Events’. The names of the three books are ‘The Bad Beginning’, ‘The Reptile Room’ and ‘The Wide Window’. If you have seen the movie then you will understand why I am reviewing the first three all together. If not, I’ll tell you. The movie is based on the first three books but when I saw the movie I thought it was brilliant and that the movie would be the first book. Actually it’s the first three all squished together, But it was really good I really enjoyed it. Unfortunately I’m not here to review the movie, I’m here to review the books.

I have been sitting here for over twenty minutes thinking of how to make this work. How to review a series of books every second week and make each review as unique as the last. I don’t know the answer to how yet but I’m sure it will come to me. I hope.

On the back of every book there is always the description of what the overall plot is. For these books it’s different, But good kind of different. It has.. Well.. Hmm.. I’m exactly sure how to word it, So I’ll show you a bit of one, because there quite long, my favorite one, on the back of ‘The Bad Beginning’:

Dear Reader, 

I’m sorry to say that the book you are holding in your hands is extremely unpleasant. It tells an unhappy tale about three very unlucky children. Even though they are charming and clever, the Baudelaire siblings lead lives filled with misery and woe. From the very first page of this book when the children are at the beach and receive terrible news, continuing on through the entire story, disaster lurks at their heels. One might say they are magnets for misfortune. 

I really love the way the author narrates the story, It’s really funny at times when he’d even bring himself in for examples in some of there situations the children are in.

Now for the actual plot of the series. The Baudelaire’s misfortunes come into play when they receive the awful news from Mr. Poe, a Banker in charge of their enormous fortune, to say that their house has burned down and their parents has died in the incident. Requested in their parents will that their guardian must be a relative, they are sent off to live with Count Olaf who they actually have never heard of or seen. When they begin living with Olaf they realize what a terrible person he is and the plans he has up his sleeve to steal the Baudelaire fortune left by their parents, by any means possible. Even if it means murder.

Now to introduce the Baudelaire siblings. Violet Baudelaire is a fourteen-years-old. You can tell she is thinking hard when her long hair is tied up in a ribbon to keep it out of her eyes. Violet has a real knack for inventing and building strange devices, so her brain is often filled with images of pulleys, levers and gears, and she never wanted to be distracted by something as trivial as her hair.

Klaus Baudelaire is the middle child, The only boy, a little older than twelve who wears glasses. Klaus loved to read, everything he would read he would remember. He knew how to tell an alligator from a crocodile. He knew who killed Julius Caesar. And he knew much about the tiny, slimy animals found at Briny Beach.

Sunny Baudelaire, the youngest, liked to bite things. She is an infant, and very small for her age, scarcely larger than a boot. What she lacks in size, however, she makes up for with her four small, yet sharp teeth.

“…you know that a good, long session of weeping can often make you feel better, even if your circumstances have not changed one bit.”

“There are many, many types of books in the world, which makes good sense, because there are many, many types of people, and everybody wants to read something different.”

“In this book, not only is there no happy ending, there is no happy beginning and very few happy things in the middle.” 

“This is my knife. It is very sharp and very eager to hurt you.”

“For Beatrice--My love for you I shall live forever. You, however, did not.” 

I really am enjoying these books and I can’t wait to review some more of them in two weeks. There all the things I love in a great book, Morbid, creepy, the use of vocabulary and … Unfortunate.